Cried Over Spilled Milk

I always see myself as a person that could see beauty in others and that including you. One thing that I love about you that how you could stay in the present time and achieved your dreams or your plans in the same time. But when my ability going overboard I could see the version of the world you used to see. It's strange how I could see all of your perspectives now; good or bad and all of your guilty pleasures. And at this point I bleeding into your mind and soul.

At first I amazed by how you could see the world as not black and white only infact you sailed into grey aread so easily. I am impressed and I am in love. Because grey or in-between colors were never come naturally in my world. So I need you to perfecting the art that I made in this world, the legacy that longing to be build upon. And at this point I don’t think nobody could ever do it except for you.

Everything become exceptionally beautiful when you are not what my soul truly seek. Because the truth is you never see the beauty in everything like I did. When I see vibrant and extreme colors in anybody, you only could see the half perfect version of it, you see everything with dull colors, everything seems so unbearable you start to cry.

Infact, that's the reason why you never truly brave enough to build your own world, you caught up on your past self, you caught up on a fear that if you start to build your own world the future might destroy them into pieces. Maybe that's why you let other people choose the colors to paint you into somebody significant, that's why you let them build the world you never recognize.

Because the only thing that you could recognize was how you truly broken inside by thinking that your very own first dream world was destroyed by your present self. You run out of vibrant colors in the past by believing that your own dreams was killed and destroyed before you. You believed that was not 100% your fault and that's why you could stay in the present more because you don't want to beat yourself up because of it.

But the bitter part is you having a hard time trusting, believing and surrendering to God's plans. And that's leading up to how you running out of love to give, you couldn't love anything except the ones that build a new world for you upon the old pieces you still cry over on.

But pardon me when I saying it exceptionally beautiful. Because you will see all of this bittersweet tragedy the way I see it in the future and why it must take place in your life. Because everything is not always like it seems and nothing lasts forever. But believe me it's also freeing and exceptionally beautiful for me too, figuring out that I can't saves anybody from any fire that they'd start. And finally it's not my job anymore to saves somebody and make them alive again by painted them into someone that's not how they truly inside.

That’s the reason why I want to believe in my self more and start appreciating my present time more. And keep going on build a foundation for my new world independently and still looking at my past self and learned the lessons about one or two things on how to fulfilled my own cups and perfecting my own self prophecy. That’s why our path never crossed, that’s why I could never truly hold your hand and saves you from something that never existed in my existing world. Because in my new world there is no people who cried over spilled milk no more, there is no people who regretting anything in constant instead I want to build a whole new world where new possibilities are something that must be embraced everyday and always.